About The Girl

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California, United States
Not-so-silent observations that splinter my conversations. Harnessing the steady flow of random thoughts and musings that continuously interrupt my daily conversations. Paired here with my artwork and photographs from recent adventures. Non sequitur (pronounced \ˈnän-ˈse-kwə-tər\)- a response which, due to its apparent lack of meaning relative to its context, seems absurd to the point of being humorous or confusing.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009


"It is not until you have a burning YES inside of you about what is truly important that you can
say NO to all of that which is urgent, but not truly important.

Our deepest guilt comes from doing the opposite, implicitly saying no to the truly important and yes, yes, yes to the urgent that is NOT important. The more we are free from non-necessities, the more we are free to do the more meaningful actions of our lives."

Stephen Covey, Everyday Greatness

This message is resonating with me today. Just the other day I was approached by a parent who in the simple process of listing her daily activities unwittingly set off a chorus of internal voices within me.

This woman's resume of career achievements and volunteering prowess in combination with her children's extracurricular activities left my head spinning. A tiny, little competitive urge within me began to say..."you could do that too...you should be doing that too..."

But this time that little voice quickly went away. In its place came a strong, resounding, almost booming "that is not how I thrive."

Probably for the first time in my life I left that conversation with a feeling of satisfaction and confidence. It is true that I could do more. I could sign up for and volunteer for more. The change for me has been realizing the cost of such seemingly small decisions.

I enjoy spearheading, conquering, coordinating and rallying. I am learning how to enjoy the satisfaction that comes along with knowing that I have enough and do enough. The pleasure of allowing someone else the opportunity to sign up and be in charge. Feeling the spirit of being a member of the team but not the captain or the one in charge. I have let go of needing to do and be all of this and that.

A few months ago I sat down and wrote out a list of the priorities in my life. The people and activities that I want to give my best to. These drive my choices and have become my short list of Burning YESes. I look forward to reviewing my list, revising and adjusting. These too may shift and change with time.

An unexpected clarity comes with knowing where my heart, intention and focus lie. A blissful reward for the burden that at times arrives with saying no.
Even when I feel the passion, enjoy the activity or agree with the cause.
No. Not now.
Even when I feel a certain sense of urgency to complete, answer, respond or react immediately.
Because while I come from a place of abundance and limitless possibility I believe that I THRIVE when I am able to focus my attention and my energy on my Burning Yeses. I thrive within my very own graceful pace. And my pace and my list may look completely different from yours or anyone else's. And that's enough.

One word can change everything. Now when I meet someone who has signed up for everything and wants to convince me to sign up too, I don't feel pressured. When I listen to the laundry list of activities, boards, organizations and committees that a colleague or friend is a part of I no longer feel like an unnecessary eagerness to compete. For the first time in a long time I feel confident and reassured.

I am thriving. We are thriving. I am grateful. That is more than enough.

Namaste. I bow to the light in each of us. I recognize the gift that is each choice that we make. Each choice that allows us an opportunity to thrive in the true knowledge of our own path. A path that serves us and allows us to thrive.

What helps you to thrive?

Thursday, October 22, 2009


Inhale. Exhale. Repeat.

Simple enough.

How we breath is how we live.

The coordinated functioning of our nervous and respiratory systems. Prompted by our environment, our mood, our reactions...this subtle, at times subconscious, act directly influences our energy.

Our shallow, irregular breaths lack the capacity to adequately fuel our organs. Running on fumes blood flow to our organs decreases, compromising digestion and concentration and increasing anxiety levels.

Breath mirrors our response. Stop. Notice. When we gain awareness our breath becomes an instructional tool for living.

When we learn to breath mindfully, deep, intoxicating, delicious inhales and exhales, we suddenly have the power and prana (energy) to live and experience fully.

Today I am enjoying the feeling of my breath when I laugh. The slow, satisfaction as my belly expands with vital air on the inhale. The cathartic wringing of a thorough exhale.

Describe your breath in this moment. Are these words you want to describe your life?

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." --Dr. Seuss

My daughter's class recently held their presidential elections. This could easily have become just another popularity contest. But my daughter's teacher had what I consider to be a stroke of genius...

Each interested candidate wrote their "speech" out on a piece of paper. The teacher then read each aloud to the class. Anonymously. The children put their heads down and listened to the words, the ideas. Rather than projecting an image of the president onto a fellow classmate or drawing conclusions based upon looks, past experiences or preconceived assumptions. How liberating to be free of all of the clutter associated with appearances and labels and identities! Just to listen to the words in that very moment. And for the candidates to be free to speak them - without the tethers of party, class, gender or color.

My daughter wrote from the heart. Her authenticity rang clear in her words. Even when someone else spoke them.

What might happen if we conducted all of our elections in such a way? Who might have been elected? Who might not have been?

Definitely makes me rather curious! What do you think?
Hint: We would definitely have had a female president by now!

Thursday, October 15, 2009


Eat, Pray, Love...Leave?

I picked up this book the first time almost a year ago. Quite frankly I didn't make it past Italy...
everyone raved about it. Perhaps my expectations were simply too high?
Am I missing something?

I felt horribly frustrated by the main character. Alright, she wasn't feeling satisfied or fulfilled in her life. But I felt that she was terribly selfish!
Fecklessly fleeing her marriage, her responsibilities...I'm somehow always reminded of the person left behind holding everything together. Call it empathy. Call it pity. Call it jealousy?

Once again I'm certain this reflects more on my own personality. She does get to leave all responsibility behind and tour around the globe staying in lovely places without a care except where to fetch her next espresso, pastry or pizza.

Don't get me wrong. I believe in dharma, true happiness and recreational travel. I also happen to believe in commitment, responsibility and discipline. There is effort involved in reaching a point of effortlessness. Right?

So I'm giving the book a second try. I don't want to give up prematurely. After all everyone else LOVED it! Especially India which I haven't yet arrived at. Am I just a horrible scrooge for not adoring this book?!

Did Eat, Pray, Love resonate with you? Am I a completely insensitive idiot for not getting it?

Have you ever encountered a book that everyone else adored that just didn't feel right to you?

Wednesday, October 14, 2009


"As the book finishes I go as slow as I can. I don't want to leave this book's world." ~Jill Robinson

Delicious reads...

I have recently had a few. And then I've also encountered books that, dare I admit, I've put down or simply left unfinished. Perhaps someday I'll pick them up again. When the time is right.

One recent favorite is a work translated from Spanish. I can only imagine the rich, poetic language of the original layered upon the story. The Shadow of the Wind, by Carlos Ruiz Zafon, reminds us that each piece we read has a distinct way of finding us precisely when we need it most.

"The art of reading is slowly dying...it's an intimate ritual...a book is a mirror that offers us only what we carry inside us, that when we read, we do it with all our heart and mind, and great readers are becoming more scarce by the day."
The words we read are perceived through our own unique filter, adding our own spin to the story and reflecting the contours of our heart.

What was the last book you read that awakened these feelings in you? What did the mirror reflect? Did you like what you saw?

Wednesday, October 7, 2009


My daughter introduced me to a new game yesterday. Are you ready to play?

Next time you're out and about, anywhere, greet everyone you pass. If they respond in a pleasant, kind or generally positive way, they're "sweet." If they ignore you, seem grumpy or annoyed by your disturbance, they're "sour."

Are you surprised by the response?

Now flip the mirror on yourself. Do you tend to be sweet or sour?

Doesn't it feel great when some one's sweet?!...

*Side notes:

This is NOT about judging others or their reactions. Rather about reflecting on our own tendencies.

Actual game was played by giggling, giddy school age children dangling out backseat windows while driving through their neighborhood. Perhaps we passed you.


"Remember there's no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end." - Scott Adams

A dear friend posted this quote on her blog, Life Without Novacaine, recently. http://lifewithoutnovacaine.blogspot.com/2009/10/acts-of-kindness-random-i-think-not.html
Wow it has returned to me over and over again during the last few days. Haunting, in a positive way!
Sometimes in our busy-ness it takes the large acts to really get our attention. The little subtle details of our ordinary interactions, especially with those in our close inner circle, often get missed. But what about each of the little, subtle kindnesses that we extend to one another over a given day?

Slow down.
Scale back.
Create a cushion of space around us.
All of these encourage gratitude to blossom and nurture us and others to continue to let the kindness flow. No matter how small the trickle. These are the ways in which we begin to NOTICE kindness in its many forms.
Kindness breeds kindness, certainly. Showing our gratitude is the water that nourishes kindness.

Sometimes the act of kindness is in the BEING and not in the DOING.

Consistently offering yourself, simply with connection, love, understanding, reaching out on a regular basis or giving a hug. BEING consistently present for those we love and care about means creating a relationship that is based on our simple EVERYDAY presence. Not waiting until the birthdays, holidays, life's big events or when we need something to make ourselves known as friends. This can be a challenge in our filled-to-the-brim lifestyles!

Have you ever had an initial urge to help, reach out to someone, offer a hand, kindness in some form...but then something inside convinced you not to?

What was an occasion when a small act of kindness was all it took to make your day?

What are some of the ways we can BE kind to those we value, rather than DO?

Tuesday, October 6, 2009


Remember we are each of us exactly where we need to be - complete, whole and enough, just as we are...

This was my daily FaceBook post a few days ago. I received such an overwhelmingly positive response, that I thought it worth revisiting.

How do we value ourselves? In today's culture how do we assess or personal worth?

It really does make such a difference when we slow down long enough to remind ourselves that we are enough, just as we are. Overflowing with divine abundance.

And just as we move with intention and clarity as we practice on our mats we are capable of choosing to move mindfully through our lives grounded in a place of love, faith and limitless abundance!

Each of us IS this!

Each of us deserves to feel safe in this sense of self-worth, no one more than the other for we are all one. All belonging to the greater whole, perfectly who and where we need to be in each moment.

Monday, October 5, 2009


Imagine what it would feel like to make a commitment to yourself...from this moment on to take only full, deep, satisfying breathes and to approach each moment in the same way with open fearlessness.

What might happen?

Friday, October 2, 2009


"Her kiss was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering." -from the History of Love

This resonated with me today. What a delicious image.

When we take inventory it's interesting to learn what's truly precious and important to us.

Who or what in our lives would we invest more time diving into and completely immersing ourselves in?

Are these people and things in your life receiving the best you have to offer?

How would your life look differently if you devoted your WHOLE LIFE to answering these questions? Mmmmm, now those are the rich details that make life worth living!

Thursday, October 1, 2009


I sent a letter this afternoon. By post. Snail mail. I had honestly forgotten how much I enjoy the simplest little details. I adore old-fashioned letters.

Carefully penning my words without spell check or the opportunity to delete and re-write. Selecting a curling cursive or a clean, printed handwriting.

The smells of fresh ink and newly printed stationary.
The textures of smooth pen between fingers and slight roughness of paper under hand.

The act of sealing the envelope, licking the gluey strip (such a distinct taste) and affixing a stamp. The character of stamps can communicate so much!

I walked the letter out to my mailbox. Positioned it carefully in the outgoing holders.

Throughout the evening as I came and went through my front door I found such pleasure in seeing that bright missive resting beneath the mailbox. Off to share birthday wishes and love to a dearly beloved sister. Such joy in sending that out into the world. Knowing someone will receive it very soon.

Our neighborhood mailman will collect it tomorrow. Until then I am enjoying its presence. I wonder how many hands will touch it before it's final destination? So unlike our impersonal, electronic communications. Lacking so many of these precious and sensory details.

When was the last time you wrote a letter? Who will you write your next letter to? Do you recall the last letter you received?